Мы, Хощ тхе снощ шинес тонигхт

[Legatus]

СТАРТИНГ.
НЕЩ УСЕР ФОУНД.
ТРАНСЛАТИНГ ТО ЕНГЛИШ, ПЛЕАСЕ ЩАИТ.
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TRANSLATING TO ENGLISH COMPLETE.
GREETINGS USER.
1 FILE FOUND
OPENING FILE
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DATE: 1259V, 30/12/1984



TO: GENERAL ALEXANDROV OF THE RED ARMY
FROM: BORIS

General, it has come to my attention, and to that of great use to you that we have discovered who assassinated Colonel John Mitchell of the United States Army. It was not in fact another country, but rather an
independent assassin on his own! Clearly of great wealth and skill, as he managed to not only poison the Colonel, but take his lieutenant's out with throwing knives. Amazingly, he did it all 30 minutes before our own troops did. By the time they arrived, the blizzard had kicked up again, and the Alaskan snow completely covered his tracks. I advise that we send a task force immediately after this target, as we can only presume it was him to later steal one of our own airplanes, and fly out just as the blizzard hit.
Below is the list of soldiers that I believe would be adequate for taking the target (Designation: Хитман):
​

Иван Красковскы
Паул Ваныа
Делл Франинг
Ыултиде Краск
Владимир Падроне

-END OF FILE-
ERROR!
MESSAGE INCOMING: 1!
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Донт Го Щхере тхе Щолвес дщелл, литтле оне.
-END OF MESSAGE-​

 

[cry]

Those three opening lines are written completely wrong. They're written in English in Russian characters, which doesn't make much sense, the names are also spelled wrong (First two, they should be spelled; Иван Красковский, Паул Ван)
Also the second to last line has the same problem as the first one, it's written in English with Russian characters.

Edit: The title is also written in English with Russian characters, please refrain from using this as it makes no sense to read either way.

 

[Legatus]

Those three opening lines are written completely wrong. They're written in English in Russian characters, which doesn't make much sense, the names are also spelled wrong (First two, they should be spelled; Иван Красковский, Паул Ван)
Also the second to last line has the same problem as the first one, it's written in English with Russian characters.

Edit: The title is also written in English with Russian characters, please refrain from using this as it makes no sense to read either way.

This was on purpose, as to confuse those with knowledge of Cyrillic characters. In this way, you still have to try and decipher the meaning.

 

[cry]

This was on purpose, as to confuse those with knowledge of Cyrillic characters. In this way, you still have to try and decipher the meaning.

Alright then, I'll remove the rating.

 

[Legatus]

Alright then, I'll remove the rating.

Thank you. And for future reference for anyone reading this and wishing to translate the text, you can only do it through translating the letters one by one, their not real Cyrillic Words, so good luck!