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SCHOOL NEWS REPORT | Ferguson Kuragari?!?

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Level 110
byewilliam
byewilliam
Rich
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Ferguson Kuragari, destroyer of worlds. Many seek to find him, many don’t even know about him. Well, who is he? Some say he was born within the halls of the penthouse apartment block, but to find out for sure, read this report full of twists, turns, drama, action, comedy, tragedy, and more to find out!



[Blue] Felix
Iroha
Tad
[Orange] Akira

One sudden day, 2 men came up to his door. Felix Kuragari opened his door to see the 2 men with piles of food. Oranges, curry, and noodles were blasted towards Kuragari, bombarding him with food.

“Hello!” they said.

Without hesitation, Kuragari responded with an uncaring answer. “What do you want?”

“I’m Tad!” one said.

“And I’m Akira,” the other followed.

“What’s your name, sir?” Tad asked, unaffected by Kuragari’s tone of voice.

“Kuragari.”

“Kuragari… Weird First name!” he responded.

Felix looked at them in disgust while Iroha Hanazono butted in, “Ferguson! Ferguson Kuragari.”

“Ferguson… Badass!”

“You sound like a bull!”

Iroha butted in once again, clearly not questioning who or why the two boys were at the door. “Amirite?!?”

“I’m not a bull…”

“You know what? You can have an orange! One orange will kill nobody!”

Felix would look at the orange for a second before blurting out, “Unless it’s poisonous…”

“Oh quit worryin’!”

“Come on, you don’t look all that bad!” Tad said all of a sudden, “Look at me, I look like a mummy!”

He looked the male directly in the eye… “Are you saying I look like a mummy?”

“Someone’s mummy- not mine…”

Clearly angered, Kuragari took the orange that was previously given to him and threw it straight at Tad’s head, as if he was pitching a baseball.

[Editor’s Note: I should totally join the baseball team right? Mookie, hit me up! *readable wink* Ryo, if you’re reading this, you’re not. Shhhhhh!]

Tad’s head bounced back from the force as Akira began to speak. “Oh come on, Ferguson, don’t be like that!”

“Don’t call me someone’s mummy. I live on my own terms.” He brought his hand up, covering a yawn. “What do you want?”

“Oh, sorry- Mr. Freedom.”

“...”

“Ferguson. I’m here to discuss something serious. The world may be at stake, even! Prepare yourself…”

“It depends on how long we have. If it’s over 5 years then I don’t care.”

“The World- Korogari, The World!”

“Kuragari.” Felix corrected.

“Okay, whatever, just hear me out here! It’s a very serious question. Are you prepared?!?”

“Fine. What do you have to say?”

His voice began trembling as he said out the question: “Milfs, Yes or No?”

Both males began showing signs of nervousness. “Come on, Ferguson!”

Felix suddenly sparked up before searching in his pocket for something: FISH?!? He took the large, raw fish… and swung it across both male’s faces, slapping both of them with a fish. Double kill, amirite?

Iroha would blurt out, “That means yes.”

Akira looked down, sad.

“I knew it… damn pinkie pie! Made my boy sad…”

Akira looked him in the eyes… “Why Ferguson… why?”

Felix ignored them, turning back to Iroha, whispering, “I’m tempted to write a report on this…”

“What a report it would be-”

“Oh, it’ll get so many readings!”

“Yeah, would be a great one-!”

“Yeah!”

Kuragari turned around, back to the two males to see Tad with an innocent looking smile and Akira pulling out a cigarette. “Well, Ferguson. You never answered my question!”

Tad turned to Akira in amazement, possibly by the cigarette- “Holy, you’re getting good at that!”

Felix whipped out the fish again, slapping Tad across the face again. “Shush. I’m discussing something.”

“I’m afraid I need an answer.”


Felix nodded… then took one step closer to Akira. Suddenly, he raised his hand, slapping the cigarette out of his mouth. “Don’t smoke in front of me.”

“What the hell, dude?!?”

The cigarette laid on the floor, weirdly not burning down the entire building- “That could’ve set the whole place ablaze! What is wrong with you?”

Akira rubbed his cheek; where Kuragari had just abused him. His expression gave off the look that he was about to cry.

“Haha-”

“Oh no-”

“Not cool, Ferguson- Not cool!”

“No- Aki, it’s okay, don’t worry about it! Want to get beef curry?”

He let out a sigh, clearly the mission for his question did not go as planned… “How could I refuse…”

Kuragari stepped back within his penthouse, slamming the door.

“Hi Ferguson! Iroha blurted out jokingly!
 

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