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SCHOOL NEWS REPORT | Highschool Bobcats: What Are They?

Best Citizen: FJ

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Photo Credit: CutieNeedsHelp

The Bobcats are the high school students at KHSCC. Specifically, they’re the sports teams, club leaders, and people like that, but we’re using it to describe all of the high schoolers today.
Starting off, we’re going to find some basic information about bobcats’ past. A list of all the things we’ll be finding out in this specific portion can be found below.
1) Parents
2) Love Life
3) Country of Origin
4) Tragedies
Parents & Family
I’m sure you’ve met at least one person who has a good relationship with their parents who both live in Karakura and also have a normal number of siblings (less than twenty-five)! Oh… what’s that? You haven’t? Surprising. Karakura is just built differently. To make the graph seen on the side, I asked twenty-seven people about their relationship with their parents. Bad Relation + Local means that they have a bad relationship with their parents, who are Karakuraians. Away means that the parents don’t live in Karakura. Non-surprisingly, the majority of the parents are dead or have a bad relationship with their kids and left them in Karakura. No wonder the crime rate at Karakura is so high when the students have so much trauma!

Love Life
What’s a bobcat’s love life like? Are they able to find love? Chances are, they aren’t. Oh whoa.. what’s this? I was right! Like always! The majority of the bobcats were single, some of them were dating other people, and a few were engaged. The majority of those who were dating other people were males, and the majority engaged were females. Why is this? I’m not sure if that’s science or sociology, but it’s certainly not roasting KHS, so it’s not my job! A lot of people in Karakura are single, so it would make sense that that would transfer over to bobcats, as well.

Country of Origin
As many of you most likely know, despite Karakura being very westernized, it does have a variety of nationalities in its people. This transfers to bobcats. Just around 29% of the people that we asked were Japanese, followed by 17% Koreans, and 11.8% Vietnamese, Italian, and Chinese. One person stated that they were grown in a lab, along with one person from the States, and one person from the Philippines. Most of the people who answered, however, were from Asia. This is strange, seeing as how westernized Karakura has become. However, I’m ****yzing why bobcats get none, not ****yzing why our town makes absolutely no sense in any way whatsoever!

Now, you’ve had a couple of tragedies in your life. Whether that be your mother dying in a car crash and your brother facing severe mental issues because of it, your father being an alcoholic and neglectful parent, or having to run away from home and boat across the ocean, before arriving at Karakura, you’ve had them. I know it. But are your tragedies aligned with most high schoolers at Karakura? The majority of them described their biggest tragedies as the death of a family member. For most of them, it was their parents, but for some, it was their siblings. Some, it was both! Then, of course, we have devastating injuries, similar to losing arms, middle fingers, legs, and many things like that. We also have heartbreak, for the people that do need to move on from their ex. Then, we have Daddy Issues. These students have a bad relationship with their parents and aren’t able to be grateful that their parents are alive, and not dead like the other 42 percent. And of course, our boy Johnny’s biggest trauma was being grown in a lab.

Day In The Life
Now, with all of this, what do we know about bobcats? Nothing much, right? We just know some statistics. Nothing about bobcats themselves. So, let’s dig a little deeper. What do bobcats do in a day?
This part will not be using graphs, unlike the questions prior.
Let’s play this as a game. I’ll set a scenario, and you’ll tell me what you think the average bobcat said they’d do.
The sun begins to rise… What do you think the bobcats are doing? Did you say… *drum roll please* Beating someone up in the sewers? If so, then you’re correct! Others said things like heading to school and waking up. Those were the main three. What are you usually doing?
After you make your way to school, attend a few classes, hang out with friends, and such, over the intercom, an old person calls out “LUNCHTIME, COME GET LUNCH!!” What are the bobcats doing? Let’s have this question be multiple-choice!
  1. Eating
  2. Beating People Up in the Bathrooms
  3. Heading to the Cafeteria
  4. Studying
Have your answers? The correct answer was… Choice 2: Beating People Up in the Bathrooms! However, two people we asked for this poll said they were just at school.’
The hometime bell rings and many timers set by students on their phones ring as well. Parents rush to the front of the school to pick up their children and the birds fly away from the school, afraid of the bell. What are the bobcats doing? This question is open-ended!
After school, the majority of bobcats we asked said they were either hiding from detention or beating up people who made fun of them from school!... Really? Is that what we’ve come to? Dang, alright.
Finally, the sun begins to set and you hear a booming voice say, “IT IS BEDTIME.” What are the bobcats doing? Try ranking the following options from most bobcats doing the activity to the activity least bobcats doing it.
  • Sleeping
  • Killing People in the Sewers
  • Creating Outfits
  • Hanging With Friends
  • Planning Murder
Well, obviously after such a long day, everyone will be sleeping!... right? I mean, who’s going to be planning murder as a high schooler..? Right, guys??? RIGHT?? Well, here are the answers:
  • Killing People in the Sewers (7 Bobcats)
  • Creating Outfits (5 Bobcats)
  • Planning Murder (4 Bobcats)
  • Hanging With Friends (2 Bobcats)
  • Sleeping (1 Bobcat)

During the data-collection stages of this report, we accidentally asked some spartans (college students) a few of our questions before realizing they weren’t bobcats. And it seems that more college students (than high schoolers) have romantic partners, they have less tragic pasts, more of them were Japanese, etcetera etcetera… So, that’s certainly something to look into!
Perhaps, if you’re a bobcat, you were just born at the wrong time! Keep your head up and power through it! Or keep your head down, looking at the people on the floor you just

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