KARAKURA NEWS
BLOCKBAY?!
“What’s a Blockbay?!”
Blockbay! A magical online application that most overlook whenever purchasing a computer. SO, what is Blockbay? Well you’re in luck! Blockbay is an online marketing software, made by the fervent workers of the Karakura Auction House. It allows people to simplify the purchasing process, by looking among listings online!
“How do I use said “BlockBay?””
To use Blockbay all of your listings are just a click away, just click the Blockbay icon, look upon the bid items, and put in your credit card information. Once you finish spending your life savings on kitten headbands, you go to the post office and pick it up! It’s as simple as that!!
"Where do I pick up my items?"
When using Blockbay, it's important to realize, that no ALL of the interactions will stay at your home. Sadly, we have to step out of our personal turtle shell of a home, and head outside for once! Where you may find many things you haven’t seen before. These things consist of: Grass!! Shampoo, and deodorant products, OTHER PEOPLE!!! Ect. On your journey outdoors you will walk your way to the KARAKURA POST OFFICE! This magical place takes all of your packages and keeps them prepared for your imminent pick up! How
wonderful! The post office is located at GPS coordinates:
1399, 17, 1237
[!] An audio file was attached [!]
???: “Hey, hey! I’m Maria Loke, a Reporter of the Karakura News station! And my client here, can you introduce yourself?”
???: [!]The sound of a male clearing his throat was heard.[!] “I am Yaroslav Sumisu, and I am 22 years old, with a Masters degree in IT.”
Maria Loke: “GGGGGGREAT! To know. So! Is it alright if I ask you a few questions about BLOCKBAY! AND! [!] A deep breath was heard [!] THE AUCTION HOUSEEE!!?”
Yaroslav Sumisu: “Go right ahead. I don’t mind!”
Maria Loke: “Absolutely! NOW. Onto question numero uno! [!] The tapping of fingers on a wooden desk was heard. [!] Have you ever USED BLOCKBAY?!”
Yarsolav Sumisu: “If I’m being completely honest. I have not. There really hasn’t been much of a reason too because I can go to other shops, or even the auction house.”
Maria Loke: “Well! That’s absolutely FINE. The reason I’m even interviewing you is to shed light on the WONDERS of BLOCKBAY!!! It’s so easy to use! Now! Do you go to the auction house often?!”
Yaroslav Sumisu: “Not all the time. But if I’m feeling like I want to spend money on something random, or maybe even useful. Then yes..”
Maria Loke: “That’s LOVELY!!! ISN’T THE WALK OVER ABSOLUTELY HORRENDOUS?! Don’t you wish you had an EASIER way over there?!”
Yaroslav Sumisu: “Honestly… yea. Granted it’s near the plaza, but still a little too much work for me.”
Maria Loke: “WELL look no further! With a SMALL payment of 100k! You can buy a PREMIUM monitor, and personal computer tower!! With that you can access BLOCKBAY!!! What is your FAVORITE, purchases from the auction house?”
Yaroslav Sumisu: “Probably a water gun, [!] A chuckle was heard [!] I like spraying it at my friends. Really makes them mad.”
Maria Loke: “So, with that water gun it’s brought you countless joy. Now, wouldn’t it have been better if you could purchase it from the COMFORT of your home?!”
Yarsolav Sumisu: “Yea. I’m not really trying to run from my apartment, all the way to the auction house.”
Maria Loke: “And then you gotta trek ALLL the way to the post office? How about just one TRIP ONLY to the post office!!”
Yarsolav Sumisu: “Oh yea. Can’t forget about the post office, now that I think about it… Blockbay be soundin’ real good right now,”
Maria Loke: “Exactly! Now, before we head off this recording, How does it sound to get BLOCKBAY!!! Now?!”
Yaroslav Sumisu: “Sounds pretty good! You’ve convinced me, not gonna lie..”
Maria Loke: “Welp! This is gonna be MARIA LOKE, AND YAROSLAV SUMISU, Signing OFF!!”
[!] The recording ended abruptly [!]
Have something you'd like to report or be reported on? Call the Reporter Hotline at (020) 980-4487, Drop a message at the news station in our anonymous reporting box, or message us on Onrain @KaNews.
