[SUGGESTION] New Rule (ADDITIONAL NOTES)

[wes]

IGN: wesnt
DATE: August 17, 2022
WHAT YOU WANT TO SUGGEST OR MENTION: I would like to suggest a new rule be added to the full server. The rule being that any RP involving romantic or intimate scenarios should not be allowed between minors and adults ICly and OOCly.

IC Example: Adult characters should not be able to date or flirt with any people in College(B) or lower.​

(This includes any form of catcalling or anything of the sort)​

OOC Example: Anyone over the age of 18 should NOT be roleplaying in a romantic sense with a minor. It's not appropriate whatsoever.​

I ask that this rule would not be taken lightly, and harsh punishment enforced.​

HOW WILL THIS BENEFIT THE SERVER/COMMUNITY?: It is known that majority of the player base consists of minors. Adults on the server should NOT be interacting with minors in this kind of sense whatsoever, IC and OOC, as it is completely inappropriate but also illegal. There have been too many instances of this happening, and in a legal sense that counts as grooming in the law's eyes. Roleplaying in a romantic sense ICly can lead to OOC grooming, as well. This would be endangering a good chunk of the player base, exposing them to things like that.

I personally can't stomach the fact that people will interact with minors like this in and out of character. It's gross.​

Here are some things I think should be known about this suggestion:

1. In no way am I asking that minors reveal their exact age online, I would never suggest for them to purposely endanger themselves. This suggestion is about honor, and I am asking that of the adult player base. It's a simple question honestly, and it should not be that hard for people to ask if they want to RomanceRP with other players.
   Just a casual 'Hey are you a minor?' 'Yes/No' will suffice. No one is asking for specific ages as this also goes against the online health and safety guide.
   It is a necessary question, as we need to prioritize minor safety on the server.
2. Online, it does not matter what country you are from, as the legal age of an adult online is at least 18. Meaning, the age restrictions in your country do not overrule the internet health and safety guide.
3. Children on this server are not in the same mindset as the adults on this server, meaning they will not be able to 'keep it IC.' Nonetheless, it is not their job to keep these boundaries in place, as the adults on the server should not even be crossing them.
   If you are an adult OOCly, you should not be typing those kinds of things to someone who is a child OOCly.
4. I understand there will need to be a definitive line on what will be considered 'RomanceRP.' At that point, we would probably need to leave it up to the Senior Admins (as you need to be an adult to be one) because not every situation will be the same.
5. THERE ARE NO CURRENT RULES IN PLACE REGARDING OOC AGE GAPS OF IC RELATIONSHIPS. I understand this is a rule that could be broken, but it should be implemented nonetheless. We, as adults, have to prioritize the safety of the minors in the server. Whether or not the rule could be broken should not even be considered, as this being put in place benefits the community more than harms it.

Before you reply, please remember there are children behind these adult characters. Even if they can separate themselves and their character, adults (OOC) should not be typing that to a child.

 

[goofygoober]

+1 +1 +1 +1 +1 +1 +1

it's so gross to see adult characters literally in their 40s hitting on like highschoolers and young college students; the rule saying you can't be in a relationship with a minor isn't good enough. Adults flirting with minors in any sense on the server should not be allowed, period.

 

[Arocatula]

I'm pretty sure people should use common sense about this and will already be banned if something like this happens, but if they aren't, +1.

 

[mustardbelly]

+1
All of these situations listed are unfortunately very common, I have been playing a high school age character (15) on the server for a good amount of time and it is disturbing to have to admit how often my character gets inappropriate treatment/s*xual harassment from characters significantly older than them. It should have not happened more than once, but it has. I have also witnessed a 13 y/o character get s*xually harassed as well as called a "sl*t" by someone over ten years older than them, this has been reported by ticket on the server too (and sorry to say, it was not taken very seriously.)

Any kind of romantic relationship between IC adults and minor characters not being allowed is already established but not very heavily enforced from my own, and my friends' personal experiences with their minor aged characters. This is an issue. I don't like having to log on and each time have to accept the fact that there is a chance my teenage character will be objectified by someone a good 5 years older than them.

As for people over 18 roleplaying out romance and intimacy with minors on the server: that is not okay. Even if you're not ERP-ing, I don't think there is any possible situation where it is morally justifiable to discuss and write out topics of intimacy and romance with a minor as a grown adult. You seriously have no business doing so and it's weird.

 

[Grass]

+1
pretty self-explanatory
i've seen instances of this happen before and its genuinely stomach-turning

 

[worst]

+1

 

[Kowhereru]

+1 ong slay

 

[Kowhereru]

Okay but all in seriousness, it genuinely doesn't feel great realizing you've been ******* after the events. It's stomach turning, it makes you feel gross, and I don't want future players to experience that at all. Especially from experience, it may seem like you're finally seen and such, however, you're not. You're just being used. And you'll finally realize that the longer you hang out with them and become more aware.

 

[hebwig]

please just strengthen minor safety overall. it’s horrid that this has to be asked for when staff acknowledge that this server is directed to and full of children. i could name a few more suggestions / other feedback that probably isn’t relative to this thread in itself but heavily encompasses the lack of minor safety practiced. take this as feedback :-/

 

[Gunna!]

4.5 The age of majority (adult) on the server is 20 and above, in accordance with present-day Japan.

4.5a Any character above the age of 25 cannot be in a relationship with a character below 23 years of age.

4.5b Characters below the age of 22 cannot be in a relationship with any character if the age gap is greater than 3 years.

This is already something that's being enforced on the server, refer to these rules here ^

 

[barbee]

This is already something that's being enforced on the server, refer to these rules here ^

its not being enforced, especially not oocly, i have already been through this kinda stuff like 3 times this week alone

 

[Ashtetic]

+ 1 , I highly agree with this , Although I do feel like even if this does become a rule on here it'll be broken constantly within the SRP community , For the one's who do this said thing really should be warned, banned or kicked.

Yes, It's uncomfortable for a lot of people in these situations when it does happen.. Even if I see this happening at certain times I most definitely don't like it, It's honestly really up to the people who are doing this said thing to stop it. Even if it does become a rule it'll still be constantly broken, The ones who do it should be getting warnings, kicks or banned, Like said there are a lot of minors within the SRP community and does make a lot of people uncomfortable , I do REALLY agree with this feedback but I still feel as if it does become a rule it'll still be broken constantly, Seeing this in the feedbacks is making my a littleeee.. sad , Knowing people are like this ICLY and OOCLY makes it worse, OOCLY is VERYYY.. uncomfortable 100% , But doing it ICCCLY in a minecraft server with one A LOT of minors , Is honestly so disturbing.. If this doesn't end up becoming a rule it could still be reported.. and dealt with so it wouldn't happen again, But knowing.. It might happen again, Adding this rule would be honestly amazing, But once again it'll most likely be broken constantly.

 

[Cencres]

+1

 

[Yonio]

+1
Currently, there are rules in place that prevent the In-Character relationship(s) between people with such age gaps

As for OOC, I also do agree on the point you made. One of the main reasons why I personally do not like RomanceRP is because of the implications it may have OOCly. Although it depends on the cases, I believe borderline ERP should be (and currently is) investigated when it comes to people with such an age gap. Im not sure what your proposal would be when it comes to "banning" this though. You would need to define the boundaries of RomanceRP as well to make it clear to players that this is not allowed

Edit: If you believe that a player is acting in a malicious manner (ICly or OOCly) please bring it up to a staff member. If you believe their verdict was not correct, you can always make a staff report and the senior admin team as well as the owner will review it from an objective point of view

 

[pleep]

+1

 

[Yume_]

(THIS IS ONLY ADDRESSING THE OOC ASPECT) ok this is gonna be really long so ill put two anonymous responses into spoilers, im neutral because it sounds great on paper but i have no idea how you'd enforce something like this without creating another problem (privacy related to doxxing)

it'd be super easy to just lie about your age, and I'm worried something like this might make people want to lie about it. And the issue there is that it's difficult to comfortably confirm someone's legitimate age, you can ask to see their legal documents but even then, it's a little uncomfortable to show online people personal information. it is HEAVILY discouraged to photograph legal documents in general (or at least in my experience). i do not support grooming, and i hope it doesn't sound like that, i just have no clue how you'd effectively moderate this rule.

im not sure if an honor system would work, because then the people who really are *******s will just lie. im with maria and a lot of you on how as a minor or even reversed its gross, usually when its yknow THAT kind of romance

Yonio's reply caught my eye in the sense that for lighthearted silly romance, you shouldn't have to ask for the other player's age. It's an uncomfortable question to ask (in my opinion).

other really big thing i want to say before i paste in the anon replies: REMEMBER TO SEPERATE OOC & IC FEELINGS!!! Only romancerp with people you're familiar/friends with!!!

Spoiler: a minor's perspective

THIS REPLY FOCUSES MAINLY ON LIGHT HEARTED ROMANCE. I am going to state my opinion regarding this suggestion, however, I would like to make it clear that I am completely neutral with the outcome of such as it is reasonable but also restricting at the same time. I would also like to state that in no way, shape, or form do I support predatory behaviour and that it is not the intention of this response. Any predatory behaviour should be reported to staff, the players parents, or any other responsible adult that a player knows, immediately for it to be dealt with.

IC EXAMPLE: This is already technically against the rules as it would be violating the entirety of rule 4.5 and the fact that sensitive and/or inappropriate topics should not be roleplayed out at all. If it is seen, it should be reported to staff as soon as possible so that they can inform the player behind the adult character to stop doing it and possibly punish them further depending on their actions.

OOC EXAMPLE: This is where I start to disagree in a sense. As I have said, I do not support predatory behaviour at all and it should be dealt with accordingly as soon as it is spotted. However, for starters, this rule as a whole would be incredibly hard to moderate as it would force players to reveal their ages to strangers online, which violates the health and safety guide on SchoolRP (refer to the image below). Not only this, but all players should understand that an IC interaction is not to be taken OOCly, whether it is romantic or combat related. I know a handful of players that have a small age gap between them (often minor and not minor) that have had characters in relationships for months yet do not feel any sort of way for each other OOCly that could lead to predatory behaviour.

I think it is important to mention that all players should be setting boundaries with each other, meaning that a player should find someone who they can trust and is able to respect their boundaries prior to engaging in any sort of romancerp with them. A player should be comfortable interacting with someone else before attempting to roleplay in any sort of romantic manner, in no circumstances should they be forced to roleplay with someone else romantically. In all honesty, most relationships on SRP aren’t even between characters played by a minor and a non-minor, and it certainly isn’t the issue. The issue stems down to the player behind the character, regardless of OOC age. As a whole, I definitely believe minor safety is something that should not be overlooked on SRP and it should definitely be enforced, however, this is not entirely the correct way to go about it. The rules are strict enough as is and roleplay should not entirely be restricted further, a player should always be allowed to completely end a roleplay dynamic if it is starting to make them feel uncomfortable and any other players should respect such if it happens. (also sexually explicit romance should be banned)

Spoiler: a not minor's perspective

I would like to start by saying I absolutely do not support grooming in any shape or form. I’ve unfortunately had an experience with it and anyone who knowingly does that to a minor is a disgusting person, with that being said I do not entirely agree with this suggestion. ICly yes, if you have an adult character you should not even be making slightly romantic comments towards a character that’s a minor, that’s gross because in roleplay there’s a huge age gap. Common sense, no one should be supporting that. Moving on to the OOC age gap, I think this part is extremely hard to explain in a good way, but one thing to keep in mind is that this is not really something you can moderate. You can't reallllyyy force multiple players to confirm their age. And if anything, this suggestion would be likely to increase the amount of minors lying about their age so they can join in with everyone else. (Forcing players to state their age is not a good thing either, especially if they ARE young). When it comes to roleplay in general, I think it's extremely important to set boundaries with your roleplay partner so you both know what you’re comfortable with, and with that RomanceRP isn’t even always on the heavily romantic side, sometimes it’s more of a close friendship with cute moments here and there. I’ve met countless SRP players who had some slight age gap OOCly while having their characters be together ICly, and it’s worked out because they’re friends and are able to keep OOC and IC separate. I don’t want to diminish anyone's problems, because I’m sure there have been situations where an IC relationship has led to something more sinister OOCly, but at the same time this is not the norm. (edited)

In any case if there IS any predatory behavior going on, staff does not take that lightly. At the end of the day we’re all playing a character on SRP, and IC relationships shouldn’t be progressing into OOC. I don't necessarily disagree with this suggestion, I don't think adults and minors should be having SEXUAL IC relationships, like f2bing and other very heavily romantic things. When it comes to light romance though, I don't really see an issue

 

[barbee]

Spoiler: a not minor's perspective

I would like to start by saying I absolutely do not support grooming in any shape or form. I’ve unfortunately had an experience with it and anyone who knowingly does that to a minor is a disgusting person, with that being said I do not entirely agree with this suggestion. ICly yes, if you have an adult character you should not even be making slightly romantic comments towards a character that’s a minor, that’s gross because in roleplay there’s a huge age gap. Common sense, no one should be supporting that. Moving on to the OOC age gap, I think this part is extremely hard to explain in a good way, but one thing to keep in mind is that this is not really something you can moderate. You can't reallllyyy force multiple players to confirm their age. And if anything, this suggestion would be likely to increase the amount of minors lying about their age so they can join in with everyone else. (Forcing players to state their age is not a good thing either, especially if they ARE young). When it comes to roleplay in general, I think it's extremely important to set boundaries with your roleplay partner so you both know what you’re comfortable with, and with that RomanceRP isn’t even always on the heavily romantic side, sometimes it’s more of a close friendship with cute moments here and there. I’ve met countless SRP players who had some slight age gap OOCly while having their characters be together ICly, and it’s worked out because they’re friends and are able to keep OOC and IC separate. I don’t want to diminish anyone's problems, because I’m sure there have been situations where an IC relationship has led to something more sinister OOCly, but at the same time this is not the norm. (edited)

In any case if there IS any predatory behavior going on, staff does not take that lightly. At the end of the day we’re all playing a character on SRP, and IC relationships shouldn’t be progressing into OOC. I don't necessarily disagree with this suggestion, I don't think adults and minors should be having SEXUAL IC relationships, like f2bing and other very heavily romantic things. When it comes to light romance though, I don't really see an issue

Spoiler: TW: Mentions of Grooming (if staff needs to remove, I understand but, no names are mentioned)

I would like to see this from your perspective, but perspective doesn't matter in the place of law. It's genuinely illegal for an adult to be romance rping with a minor, whether or not its consented to icly/oocly. An adult should find no interest in romance rping with a child. I am a legal adult, I turned 18 this year. Before so I have had numerous experiences where I regret what I've done as a child because I truly do regret the things I did ICly with adults and wish I was never persuaded to do such. The brain of a minor is nothing like a grown adults, there should be no romance interactions between someone whose above the age of 18 and someone whose below the age of 18 romantically (unless its like a 18 & 17 yr old oocly) because, grooming does not have to push through the boundaries of RP to be considered legally grooming. You are typing that to a child, that child is typing those messages back to you, that should never be allowed and I mean if people genuinely consider doing such they need to be investigated. Boundaries can be set, but still boundaries are not enough. Its not hard to just not romance rp with someone who happens to be a minor OOCLy.

 

[ahhhhhh12]

+1

People also fail to realize that the majority of characters on SRP are usually self-inserts... children will project onto their characters naturally. Children do not know better. It does not matter if this rule would be hard to enforce; it should be enforced regardless of that.


Adults should not be roleplaying out romance, even if it is "light" with children. I have personally seen it evolve into not-so-light situations multiple times. It's not a rare occurrence. It is not normal to roleplay romance with a minor if you are an adult; you can ask anyone offline. It is incredibly weird. If you are an adult, there are adult-focused roleplay platforms out there.

 

[needle]

+1

People also fail to realize that the majority of characters on SRP are usually self-inserts... children will project onto their characters naturally. Children do not know better. It does not matter if this rule would be hard to enforce; it should be enforced regardless of that.


Adults should not be roleplaying out romance, even if it is "light" with children. I have personally seen it evolve into not-so-light situations multiple times. It's not a rare occurrence. It is not normal to roleplay romance with a minor if you are an adult; you can ask anyone offline. It is incredibly weird. If you are an adult, there are adult-focused roleplay platforms out there.

this is so fucking true

 

[Grass]

(THIS IS ONLY ADDRESSING THE OOC ASPECT) ok this is gonna be really long so ill put two anonymous responses into spoilers, im neutral because it sounds great on paper but i have no idea how you'd enforce something like this without creating another problem (privacy related to doxxing)
View attachment 34467
it'd be super easy to just lie about your age, and I'm worried something like this might make people want to lie about it. And the issue there is that it's difficult to comfortably confirm someone's legitimate age, you can ask to see their legal documents but even then, it's a little uncomfortable to show online people personal information. it is HEAVILY discourage to photograph legal documents in general (or at least in my experience). i do not support grooming, and i hope it doesn't sound like that.

Yonio's reply caught my eye in the sense that for lighthearted silly romance, you shouldn't have to ask for the other player's age. It's an uncomfortable question to ask (in my opinion).

other really big thing i want to say before i paste in the anon replies: REMEMBER TO SEPERATE OOC & IC FEELINGS!!! Only romancerp with people you're familiar/friends with!!!

Spoiler: a minor's perspective

THIS REPLY FOCUSES MAINLY ON LIGHT HEARTED ROMANCE. I am going to state my opinion regarding this suggestion, however, I would like to make it clear that I am completely neutral with the outcome of such as it is reasonable but also restricting at the same time. I would also like to state that in no way, shape, or form do I support predatory behaviour and that it is not the intention of this response. Any predatory behaviour should be reported to staff, the players parents, or any other responsible adult that a player knows, immediately for it to be dealt with.

IC EXAMPLE: This is already technically against the rules as it would be violating the entirety of rule 4.5 and the fact that sensitive and/or inappropriate topics should not be roleplayed out at all. If it is seen, it should be reported to staff as soon as possible so that they can inform the player behind the adult character to stop doing it and possibly punish them further depending on their actions.

OOC EXAMPLE: This is where I start to disagree in a sense. As I have said, I do not support predatory behaviour at all and it should be dealt with accordingly as soon as it is spotted. However, for starters, this rule as a whole would be incredibly hard to moderate as it would force players to reveal their ages to strangers online, which violates the health and safety guide on SchoolRP (refer to the image below). Not only this, but all players should understand that an IC interaction is not to be taken OOCly, whether it is romantic or combat related. I know a handful of players that have a small age gap between them (often minor and not minor) that have had characters in relationships for months yet do not feel any sort of way for each other OOCly that could lead to predatory behaviour.

I think it is important to mention that all players should be setting boundaries with each other, meaning that a player should find someone who they can trust and is able to respect their boundaries prior to engaging in any sort of romancerp with them. A player should be comfortable interacting with someone else before attempting to roleplay in any sort of romantic manner, in no circumstances should they be forced to roleplay with someone else romantically. In all honesty, most relationships on SRP aren’t even between characters played by a minor and a non-minor, and it certainly isn’t the issue. The issue stems down to the player behind the character, regardless of OOC age. As a whole, I definitely believe minor safety is something that should not be overlooked on SRP and it should definitely be enforced, however, this is not entirely the correct way to go about it. The rules are strict enough as is and roleplay should not entirely be restricted further, a player should always be allowed to completely end a roleplay dynamic if it is starting to make them feel uncomfortable and any other players should respect such if it happens. (also sexually explicit romance should be banned)

Spoiler: a not minor's perspective

I would like to start by saying I absolutely do not support grooming in any shape or form. I’ve unfortunately had an experience with it and anyone who knowingly does that to a minor is a disgusting person, with that being said I do not entirely agree with this suggestion. ICly yes, if you have an adult character you should not even be making slightly romantic comments towards a character that’s a minor, that’s gross because in roleplay there’s a huge age gap. Common sense, no one should be supporting that. Moving on to the OOC age gap, I think this part is extremely hard to explain in a good way, but one thing to keep in mind is that this is not really something you can moderate. You can't reallllyyy force multiple players to confirm their age. And if anything, this suggestion would be likely to increase the amount of minors lying about their age so they can join in with everyone else. (Forcing players to state their age is not a good thing either, especially if they ARE young). When it comes to roleplay in general, I think it's extremely important to set boundaries with your roleplay partner so you both know what you’re comfortable with, and with that RomanceRP isn’t even always on the heavily romantic side, sometimes it’s more of a close friendship with cute moments here and there. I’ve met countless SRP players who had some slight age gap OOCly while having their characters be together ICly, and it’s worked out because they’re friends and are able to keep OOC and IC separate. I don’t want to diminish anyone's problems, because I’m sure there have been situations where an IC relationship has led to something more sinister OOCly, but at the same time this is not the norm. (edited)

In any case if there IS any predatory behavior going on, staff does not take that lightly. At the end of the day we’re all playing a character on SRP, and IC relationships shouldn’t be progressing into OOC. I don't necessarily disagree with this suggestion, I don't think adults and minors should be having SEXUAL IC relationships, like f2bing and other very heavily romantic things. When it comes to light romance though, I don't really see an issue

I think romancerp even if light-hearted shouldn't really take place between a child and an adult

There is a surprising amount of players over 20 years old on this server and it doesnt really sit right with me knowing that this sort of behavior can and has happened... I dont think someone really needs to specify their age but they could simply ask OOCly if they're a minor without revealing any real personal information

As stated in another person's reply, children are bound to project onto their characters. Now if an adult's character was seen interacting with that person's? Yikes.

EDIT: I should probably also mention that while yes, you should only romancerp with people you trust, it should also be with people around your age